Tee Time

Between 2002-2010, I doodled a bunch of terribly punny comics that combined my love of wordplay and corny drawing skills. NitWits were the perfect creative container to let my silly out while allowing abstract freewriting to brainstorm through me. Some comics spawned coloring pages, cartoony lessons, and other imaginative things. These are among my favorite.

Nit Wits #34

Chicken Eggo (2007)

Which came first, the chicken or the eggo?

Ego is described as "the self as distinguished from others." And as I'm pecking my way through Murray Stein's "Jung's Map of the Soul", the glossary defines ego as "the center of consciousness, the 'I.'" Yes, two ways of saying eggproximately the same thing.

In a 'what if' stream of consciousness I envisioned what a free-range chicken taking an online Web quiz measuring his chicken-ness would look like.

How Chicken Are U?

The anima (or animus) of a chicken would feel most authentic in pecking answer #1 for this question. Like any predictable poultry, he would secretly wish to respond to the 'important' questions with the most eggtractive answers.


Nit Wits #52

Best Diet Cookies Ever! (2010)

They run away!

Problem: It's late-night and you're craving carbs, tempted to eat something sweet and break your resolve.

Solution: Open up a bag of Runaway Gingerbread Man Cookies (RGM) Pull one out, and before you know it, he wiggles out of your hand, jumps to the floor, and runs away. What could be better for your diet than that!

Yes, they're cute. But that's never stopped you from snarfing down smiling goldfish crackers or Keebler E.L. Fudges, has it? So going beyond mere cuddly appearances, the real secret ingredient to the success of RGM cookies is they've been stacked and packaged in a green room in Fairy Tale Studios where hoards of the "smarter" out-foxing ones gathered after crossing the river without getting eaten. Their stories of how vary, and some have gone through some long recovery periods, but you can imagine how restless they are having waited all this time to be called back to work.

The good news is they're chock-full of energy, ready to run and sing — which you'll soon see how this works to your weight-loss advantage.

Don't you agree that the best diet cookie is the one that you don't eat?

5 Ways RGM Cookies Help You Lose Weight:
  1. Food that runs away cannot be consumed. As soon as you open the package, the cookies WILL jump out and run.
  2. Fast food raises your metabolism. When you go after a cookie hoping to catch and taste its delicious crunchy sweet goodness, you'll burn tons of calories chasing him and get a good workout to boot.
  3. Annoying food is hard to stomach. His constant taunting, "Run, run, as fast as you can..." is seductive personal training at its best. You can't ignore his challenge and it's the cheapest training around. Look at all the money you'll save trying to prove him wrong!
  4. No havoc gets wreaked on your system (physical or mental). By not eating even one arm of a cookie, you'll save yourself from bad-carb blood-sugar spikes and crashing, woes of eater's remorse, and guilt from possibly devouring a family cookie-man with baby ginger snaps at home.
  5. Seconds are always easy to resist. Should you somehow find the stamina to out-fox the cookie and find it gleefully in your snout, you'll be sweaty, out of breath, and find it mighty crumby anyway. Would you soon go through all of that again for another?

Nit Wits #8

Tee Time (2002)

Earl Grey: Par for the Course

What did you imagine your golf equipment did when it needed a break? Betcha didn't think that the lowly tee had so much class! It's Earl Grey, by the way.

Tee Time Coloring Page (Creativity Portal)